A few summers ago, my family and I were hiking in the Appalachian mountains.  It was fun, beautiful, serene even… except for my one daughter who really didn’t want to be there and somehow was the only one to acquire legit stinging nettle wounds that only reinforced her anti-everything adolescent mindset of the afternoon.  After stopping for a bite to eat and catching our breathe from a steep, off trail, climb my husband challenged us to, we got underway again.

With dogs running zig zag patte...

Parenting is hard.  When you have to say no to something they really want or yes to something they are dreading.  When natural and corrective consequences come and all you want to do is hug them and take it for them, but you know they will not build the strength life demands without these trials.  When their brain is under construction, and you seem to be speaking two different languages, when everything has to be an argument or when isolation and silence is deafening.

No parent I have ever ...

I was doing some research earlier this week all about what we bring into relationships.  The research had all to do with workplace relationships and friendships, but it shined a new perspective into parenting and leading youth for me. 

The research begs the question…

What are each of us bringing into this parenting and leading role?

When you go for a job interview you need to supply a resume, even those first jobs my girls have gotten scooping ice cream and seating eager pizza patrons. ...

Since this article is coming out ON Valentine’s Day it just seemed appropriate to focus some attention on this prescribed love day, especially when it comes to our young daughters, but maybe not in the “love struck, cherub shooting, box of chocolates” way you think.

Working with adolescent girls and families and leaders raising them you can imagine that I hear the full spectrum of “I hate this hallmark holiday” to, “I am so excited for Valentine’s!!” to, my favorite, “I will neeeeeveeeeerrrr...

 “When do I step in and help?”.

This is a very common question for any parent or leader of youth.  It is so hard to sit on the side lines of someone’s life that you care for and have sacrificed for and NOT help when you see a struggle, but should you?  Maybe aaaannnnd… maybe not.

Any parent who has been to a sports event their child is participating in knows exactly how this feels.  They have been to practice for months, maybe years, been led and taught and then when the time comes to do...

Being in a dynamic, estrogen drenched, family comprised of four adolescent young women and myself being in my mid-forties and, let’s say “hormonally chaotic”, has taught me some things about limits and healthy boundaries.

One of my healthy boundaries is no drama after 6pm... when at all possible. 

Some people have a glass of wine, some stay away from caffeine after six and others turn down the blue light.  But, for me, the biggest trigger to nights of anxiety, being wide-awake while bein...

I don’t even pretend to understand American football (or European football, aka soccer, for that matter) at all.  I used to be a proud marching band geek (clarinet thank you very much) and went to every game for years, but never really paid attention.  I was too busy socializing. 

But there is one thing I know about the game for sure and that is that you need BOTH an offensive and a defensive strategy to be successful and this really does echo out in life, leading and parenting too… BUT most...

There are many stages of childhood and, for each child, they are further broken down and different.  I would argue that there are as many stages of parenthood to meet that individual and unique child’s needs of that season we well.  An immature season requires more responsibility, grace and structure while a season robust in self-accountability may need a hand of frivolity and seeking joy in the moment.

But, JUST looking at the parenting side of the equation, there are really 3 main phases w...

Wouldn't it be nice if a neatly packaged box of peace or freedom was under your tree this year?

I don't mean the trip to Aruba you've been secretly researching or the silent treks through Iceland's glaciers you daydream about (I keep hearing Iceland is a great place to go!).  This isn't about escapism, but real freedom in where you are right now.  Peace IN the chaos, IN the crazy, IN the mess, IN the drama and IN the inevitable hustle.

The trick is that you can not find this gift hidden in the...

If you are reading this, I think I can assume you are a parent or leader that truly cares about your daughter and the young women [and men] you are leading of the next generation.  So, this article is not about the overt and dangerous ways people can hurt their children in the name of “loving” them.  This is about the people like you and me that care and love these kids so much that in doing so we can easily end up enabling poor choices and holding them back from their growth through passivity a...